Confetti...

is for birthdays.

Happy Birthday!

York

Please answer the group of questions listed below.
1. Briefly, describe your training or background in the visual arts.
2. Briefly, describe other courses and/or activities you have been involved in that are related to the arts.
3. Briefly, describe your reaction to an art exhibition you have seen in the last year.
4. Please tell us about a book, film, a piece of music, play or visae you have experienced within the last year that has had an impact on your feelings about art.
5. How do you envision your future in the art field?

time is...

running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running

running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out runnint out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out running out of time.

gleam

what is this gleam in your eye?

your wants, your desires,

who are you anymore?

what is this gleam in your eye?

what does it stand for?

who does it stand for?

make up your mind.

only one more sleep...

it doesn't feel much like christmas.

let the witch hunt begin!

well technically its not witches i'm after/i am starting my hunt this morning/i simply must find it/i'll see if you have it/hopefully you dont/but if you do/i must hunt again and again and again/until i find something new/to hunt.

hunt.

hunt.

i'll be sneaky/and swift/like a fox is so overrated/but i'll hunt/like they hunt/for witches.

at 7:30 am///

this morning i had a dream.

in this dream, not only was tokio hotel going to play a set in my highschool cafeteria, but bill kaulitz asked me personally to help him set up the stage. Then, as i was standing front row pressed against the wooden stage, he found out that the rest of the band was stuck in the snowstorm so he was left to play his set alone. He only played one song before i found myself on the stage with him looking down upon my little friends.

i'm pretty sure i made this up.

but i'm pretty sure it was fun.

winter blues

slip me a turtleneck
i'll be sure to choke on it.

cheated out of a heart

somehow i still feel cheated
somehow i'm left wanting more
somehow i know it'll never come.
something that will never come.
always wanting
more.

more,


more.

candy cane kisses

they're in the mail cause i can't give them to you in person.

oh how much i need you

so why won't you let me buy tickets?

your smile

its not enough anymore.

a shower.

wet.

wet.

wet.

that's what i'll be.

the knob

it slips

from my fingers,

all pruny.

it slips.

slips.

my skin

burns: raw

from the heat.

red.

red.

red

are my feet.

claws

drag

dig

drag

leaving tracks

across my

back

shoulders

and neck.

steam.

hits.

hits.

til it drips.

drips.

dew

on the walls.

dots

of cold

slide

and fall.

fall

to my feet.

tap

the drain

collecting

the week's worth

of dirt

from my skin.

dirt.

dirt.

puddles

growing.

drowning.

swallowing me

whole.

whole.

mykul hobden

this is his self-portrait in acrylics. he is amazing.

the girl on the wall.

photograph by aaron caven

knowledge is an abstract term

knowledge is an abstract term.
there is no such thing as
knowing.
we can never know anything
but i know i love you.

ART SHOW ART SHOW ART SHOW!

i know these pictures are not related, but i like what he's wearing.

beautiful (L)

death to a cell phone

i wish you'd go away. or perhaps you'd never been born.
stupid phone.

So much time...

"so much time with so little to do. Wait, scratch that, reverse it."

coincidence of events

pinpoint

the answer,

you'll never know how.

some things

at random

and out of control,

escape my fingers.

but i'll just smile.

black and blue woman

A body,
swathed in flannels,
hoists itself
upon rickety bones.
Palms flexed
and forearms shaking
from the weight.
Blue and purple
veins
protrude
from crumpled
tissue-paper
skin. Groans.
Creaking bones.
The body trembles
and twists
and breaks
its tensed form.
Rump first,
legs swing second,
loosening,
and toes,
toes searching
and digging
for a gap in the sheets,
a cave, a fissure
to slide into.
Arthritic hands,
with knuckles
swollen,
and flesh
shrunk,
grope forwards
in the blackened dark,
closing tightly
on the corners
of plump fabric,
until it almost drowns
the body,
up to the neck.
The head falls.
Eyelashes dance
until they finally,
slowly,
surely,
run out of energy.

not

i thought i was supposed to be happy.

no more pretense

stop pretending,

there's no more use.

i see right through

the smile,

the laugh.

don't try to deny

that you're letting go

someway

somehow

you're letting go

of me.

i'll be

lost

without you

sad

without you

but maybe my heart

needs the break.

maybe its me

but the tears

are real

the hurt

is real.

but what is real?

instead i pretend.

"we're making out inside crashed cars"

We're making out inside crashed cars
We're sleeping through all our memories
I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive
(now I only waste it dreaming of you)

bad, ass.

i think so.

please my dear, just one more chance...

i'd give anything, everything

you're my everything, anything.

forgive all my faults, and i'll do the same.

i'm trying, i swear,

but i know i could do better.

but i can't,

not now,

i'm sorry.

a "broken composer"

we haven't spoken

in what seems like forever

so now i'm left broken:

a broken composer.

an empty mind,

an empty soul,

no progress on paper

nor in my whole.

fix me, or break me,

i'm tired of being stuck

in this limbo of feeling

nothing at all.

lets write a story...

just like glass

hmm i wish my hair was black.

owch.

tell me where it hurts,

i'll help it to bleed.

tell me when you're sleeping

and i'll startle you awake.

tell me when i've gone too far

and i'll jump right off the edge.

i miss you.

without you i'm so lonely
i'm tearing at my own skin
i'll wait for you forever
if i don't go insane.



without you i'm so lonely
the world seems crumbling in
the sky must be falling
for this tragic state i'm in.

without you i'm so lonely,
i'd run to you if i could.

dazzle me

in the form of my mother's first barbie doll,

this dress is my childhood.

this dress was her love,

and so this dress was mine.

Maybe a tad flashy,

but worth it, nonetheless.

dawn of the dead

old, forgotten

not exactly broken

but no longer desired

left behind

to rot.

stranger things have happened in Wonderland

photograph by aaron caven

oh yes, i will attempt this.

beware:

"the balloon tree"

filled my life with fairytales

where balloons could win over evil

and childhood was endless:

endless days of happiness,

endless amounts of friends,

enless possibilities,

and endless amouts of balloons.

the future was not to be seen,

in a land far, far away,

a story book life

filled with ballgowns and princes

and enough balloons to share.

now i only have one balloon left,

and i already gave it to you.

its so bright.

think, think.

i have an idea!

my light in my dark,

where shadows can't reach.

i love you.

its not what it looks like

its not what it looks like, i swear
utterly harmless, nothing to worry of.
oh, a monster?
well then yes, you'd be correct.

heart in my throat

shut up brain

shut up heart

no one wants to hear what you have to say

stop thinking, stop breathing

you're not allowed to feel this way.

don't jump like that

don't thump like that

close your eyes

pretend its not real

shut your eyes tight

"restraint is key",

but i don't need salvation

only the smile upon my lips.

the mad hatter.

mad as rabbits,
crazy as squirrels
.

stream of consciousness

Lonely. Alone Between people left alone what she wanted no more rush no more time or lack thereof Alone hat on head red natural red fake red Eyes twitch pen writes blue ink blue eyes No more tears No more blue-eyed tears Twitch Falls in her face red hair covers lips red happy satisfied alone Tongue sticks out false rudeness a friendly gesture expresses her Smile alone “Just let me be” alone but not lonely never again lonely no more no more I am here just here now not when you needed me but now still Alone “please god no!” No more lonely please please please not again please no more. Lonely.

wonderland

take me to wonderland,

it'll be worth every second.

photograph by aaron caven

kiss me goodnight

to kiss me goodnight is to kiss me goodmorning,

because you my dear, are my sun.

who is this?

photograph by aaron caven




a monster,
a reflection
of a girl i once knew.
shattered,
crumpled
pieces of who i used to be.

windblown

toss my hair

into the air.

lets get lost

in a forest of thoughts.

"whisper me- all your secrets"

Just your shadows touch

Makes me feel alive

Reset your eyes

Erase your mind

Whisper me

All your secrets

Let's run into the pourin' rain

To feel that we're alive again

-th

the frame of all looking glasses

"there's no lifeguard in the gene pool."

probably the best interpretation of through the looking glass yet so far in all my months and years of dedication to finding the perfect one.

maybe this is it.

well done.

look, its you.

glass box.

trapped within a solid glass box

suffocating slowly.

dearest pandora,

open the lid,

free me

fearlessly.

i'm not so bad, i promise.

just open it.

time travel

turn just back the clocks
stay a bit longer
through time we'll travel
a just bit longer
a bit just longer
a longer bit just
bit longer just
longer bit just
just longer bit
bit longer
longer
just

stay.

quite fitting

oh dearest Zombie girl,
tomorrow is a new day afterall,
and this sickness is likely applicable.

oh yes, yes they did.

Lead-singer and style icon Bill Kaulitz will visually put the show together with the twins Dan and Dean of international mega lable DSQUARED.

14.04.2010 FR Paris BERCY

yes. yes i will.